Messy Tuesday with a vengeance.

Remember when I used to do Messy Tuesday posts? Well, what you're about to witness is the Messy Tuesday to end all Messy Tuesdays.

A few background notes for this vost:
1) the room in question doesn't usually look quite this bad - I had pulled out all the toy bins for organising;
2) the kids promised me "Mum, if you clean our room, we will DEFINITELY keep it that way until Christmas." [insert hollow laugh]; and
3) this is something I hear all the time: "Mum, we need more socks. All our socks are lost. We can't find any socks. Buy us more socks."

 

My Wicked, Wicked Ways

Quite likely, Errol Flynn had something else in mind when he used that title for his memoirs, but it is apt enough to describe me, and my sad, slatternly habits.

It's been a good while since I had a Messy Tuesday post, but that doesn't mean it's been a good while since I had a Messy Tuesday. This is my laundry room. It's meant to be a "Before" picture, but the "After" hasn't arrived yet.

Mañana, I say.

I was in my old beloved city on the weekend, to bear witness to this:

...the wedding of a young man who was once like a brother to me, to a young woman who seems very promising indeed.

Weddings always make me cry, and not because they're happy occasions. They make me cry because those two are standing at the foot of Everest, squinting optimistically up at the summit. The happy couple is thinking about standing astride the peak, in a heroic pose, with endless sky behind them. When in fact, if they ever DO get there, they will be bruised, bleeding, suffocating and suffering. Marriage is bloody hard work.

This shouldn't be taken in any way as a slight to my husband, by the way.

And anyhow I'm sure the last 13 years have been just as gruelling for him as they have been for me. We love each other like sandwiches, but I think every married person would agree with me that, to make it work, each partner needs a level of perseverance and dedication that few newlyweds are prepared for.

But hey - marriage is the ultimate 'learn as you go' activity...second only to parenting, I'd say. We're all works in progress. Which brings me to my closing photo - a progress shot. It's not really After, it's more During, but improvement is noticeable.

See? anyone can change.

Dear Santa

Six months from now, you better not bring any more stuffies to this house, you fat bastard.

Hail to the Chief

A HA!! I AM TRIUMPHANT!! I HAVE FINALLY GROSSED YOU PEOPLE OUT!!

I am feeling so smug right now, you wouldn't believe it. All this time I've been posting Messy Tuesdays, and you lot keep jeering "Messy?! Ha! You should see my bathroom/coat closet/countertop/laundry pile. You're nothing but a poseur!" And now I have shown you that indeed I AM Queen Slattern!

Also, you guys have just made my mind up for me - I'm going to continue blogging after all. Your comments on that last post made me laugh so hard, my stomach hurt - I actually cried from it. (From the laughter, not the stomach hurting. I'm way tougher than that.)

Ew.

weird smell

plus

slow drain

plus

toilet plunger

plus

2.5mm crochet hook

plus

bare hands

equals

the most disgusting half hour of my life.

What Lies Beneath

It's been a long time since I did a Messy Tuesday post, but I have a problem I need help with. See this?



It's my stove. I've been keeping it kind of tidy recently but the stovetop isn't the problem......I know it's time - and past time - for me to pull that sucker out and clean behind it. We've been living in this house four years and it's never been done.

Normally I'd do it myself, but this poor old thing has no feet. Its little foot-screw-thingies are sitting on bits of folded cardboard so they don't puncture the linoleum, (it was a TEMPORARY measure when we moved in - we were supposed to buy another stove but it turned out this thing went like a house on fire - it was just old) so I can't just walk or drag the stove out of its slot - it has to be lifted.

I'm preternaturally strong, of course, but even I can't single-handedly lift a 25+ year old stove from a spot between counter and wall, where it is wedged with a half-inch of clearance.

So I need help.

But if I ask for help, the person who helps me is going to see something.

They are going to see all the things that have gone down the side of the stove since we moved in.

And I am clumsy and tend to drop things, so this person will see the following:

-at least one dessicated waffle
-at least two dessicated pancakes
-several bits of pasta
-a tablespoon of peppercorns (you'd think those would have rolled out the bottom but I think they are caught in the squares of the waffle)
-some drips of various sauces
-probably some things I don't even know about

Mum's out - too clean. My friend is out - too clean. My sister - not here. Also too clean. My husband - I'm too proud. What I NEED, really, is one of you to help me, since you guys know just how bad a housekeeper I am and nothing will surprise you.

Any volunteers?

Eeny Meeny Messy Tuesday

Not quite sure what to post today for Messy Tuesday: I have too many options. But here's a mess:

and here's what I did instead of cleaning it up:

Thank you for your get-well wishes - I am feeling slightly better although I'm sure I'll feel worse tomorrow because today is a real runaround for us. There are two dance classes, dinner, and a Brownie meeting, all between 2.30 and 7.30. It may only be one dance class, though - Emily looks to be succumbing to the Dreaded Lurgy.

My uncles have asked me to knit another sweater for Ruby, in time for Christmas. They went book-shopping, and sent me an entire big hardcover knitting book, called Knitting Year-Round. They chose a very cheeky jacket with a stocking cap (wait a second.....am I supposed to be knitting the stocking cap too, guys? I never even thought of it...let me know so I can whip out and buy more grey yarn.) in pewter basket stitch with zany green and orange stripes. Here it is:

The pattern doesn't go down to Ruby's size - it starts at 4 years old - and calls for an acrylic worsted yarn. The heavy yarn, combined with the blocky stitch pattern, would have been too much for a two-year-old's little frame. Also, I can't buy that particular yarn in town (and even if I could....) so I went back to the Smart wool that I used for Drifting - a DK weight, 100% wool yarn that comes in a lot of colours. The Smart does have a grey, but it was a little dark. I went to Loyal, another wool DK, for a softer tone.

I swatched it at knitting last week and found that the fabric is a little rough, a little crispy, until it's washed. The wool and the stitch pattern both relax, making the work more drapey and much softer. I think the basket stitch will be just insulating enough, trapping those pockets of air, to make it a warm little sweater without too much heat. I measured the gauge carefully before and after washing, and adjusted the pattern accordingly. The gauge is quite different between the two yarns, as you'd expect - I'm getting 20.5 sts over 10 cm, and the pattern is written for 16 sts over 10 cm. The finer gauge makes for a more proportional sweater for a toddler, and also corrects the sizing issue nicely. I cast on the number of stitches given for the largest size, and it will fit her perfectly when finished (well, hopefully there'll be a little growing room).

As to the stitch pattern, the lime and orange stripes are shaped in an interesting way. Instead of making bobbles, which they appear to be at first glance, you do a 7-stitch increase at intervals on row one, then you follow that with a whole row of reverse stockinette with no decreases. The decreases are worked in grey over the next three rows. And, most importantly, the centre stitch of the seven is slipped on two consecutive rows, lifting the centre of the increase dramatically to create the bump shape.

I'm planning to have this finished by the beginning of November, leaving me lots of time for all the Christmas knitting for more local folks. It's going fast enough, if I can refrain from dropping any stitches...I dropped one last night, and because the same stitch is slipped on two consecutive rows, suddenly I had a ravelling mess where a green bump used to be. There was no fixing it without ripping, so I had to pull back four rows of textured knitting and redo them.

Lastly, Uncle Dave sent me photos of Ruby in Drifting, and I'm DYING to show them to you. I'll wait til tomorrow, though, to give them their own post.

I have needs, y'know.

It's a little Google fun, brought to you by the big, bored Internet.

I Googled Shannon needs and found that I am more high-maintenance than I thought.

Shannon needs to be more vigorously investigated by the Irish government. Shannon needs an alibi. Shannon needs to stomp that Latin out. Needs your support. Needs Atlantic Roadway now. Needs to stop singing. Needs to learn to soothe her moods with something other than food. Shannon needs more cred. Shannon needs no more treatment. Shannon needs a car.

And Shannon needs to shake her booty more.

And I'm going to add one more thing: to put away the clean laundry.

Right Round Baby

Thanks for your input on the last post, and would you believe we got over 200 votes? I'm shocked, even though it WAS possible to vote twice. That's still a lot of people.

So far Boo is in the lead, but Joe and Dave haven't made a final decision yet...do you need more possibilities, guys? Because I can come up with more...and now that I know you want "girly", I can certainly deliver that.

Yesterday I took my sister-in-law and niece to the local Ashford/Louet dealer for a private drop-spinning lesson. We took the camera, but when the rep gave us each a spindle to try, we completely forgot about the camera and didn't take a single picture. I was using a locally-made maple spindle and fell in love with it, but didn't buy it quite yet. I did, though, buy my niece her choice of spindle - an Ashford top-whorl. She also came home with 250 grams of fiber - mostly Corriedale, but with 50 grams of merino in the mix as well. She picked up the knack quickly, and is a fair way to being obsessed with spinning.

For my part, I loved it. I loved the meditative nature of the task, though my results were fairly imperfect:

Today is Messy Tuesday, so here is my laundry pile from camping on the weekend:

but instead of doing it I swatched my handspun:


and enjoyed that very much.

Edit: I forgot to show you a picture of Piper, who has grown a lot in the last few months. Isn't he cute?

Messy M-F

For Stephanie:

Told ya.

Choices

jumbled up all here and there

bits of stuff are everywhere

furrowed brow as fingers do

magic with some glitter glue

push aside the towels and sit

just ten minutes while I knit

buttered scone and cup of tea

children snuggling with me

sometimes there's a bit of mess

but mostly...

mostly happiness

-Copyright 2008, me

It's Messy Tuesday and here is my longsuffering coffee table.

And here is a lovely, lovely post which is perfect for the day on which we look around at the things we Have to do, and decide instead to do the things we Want to do. Kristine is an occasional commenter here at HalfSoled Boots - I met her on Ravelry. She has lovely little baby and a busy life with family, home, work and craft, and she still finds time to blog. This short little post is a verbal snapshot of a warm afternoon with mothers and daughters and potting soil, and a few lines of inspired prose. It's just beautiful, and well worth your time to read. Enjoy.

Growth - with photos.

Origami beads, strung with Czech glass (and yes, the odd plastic) for a friend.

Cap Shawl update - I'm on round 153 of 163. Once the main body is finished, I shall have the pleasure of knitting the attached border.

Stripey socks news: a disaster befell me while I was riding to knitting a few weeks ago. Due to a combination of careless sock-stowage and winds generated by incredible, super-human speeds, my sock-in-progress, along with its Addi Turbo, got sucked into the pedal thingy. Like, the place where the pedal is attached to the bike. The entire shooting match was wrapped so tightly around the pedal thingy (help me out here, Lizbon) that I had to cut the yarn free, and now my Addi Turbo is permanently kinked in several places. Dirty grease is immovably ground into the leg of the sock. And I have lost my mojo.

But look how good my dinner was.

Baby Yukon Golds, olive oil, butter, rosemary from my garden, Maldon salt and cracked pepper.

Pink hardy geraniums, and my first ever stargazer (I think that's what it is).

Chives, a very pretty plant that also provides highly popular bee and butterfly habitat. These are unbelievably hardy, fast growing, and you can cut them down after their first bloom to get a second one later in the summer. Hummingbirds love them too.

And with all this stitching, knitting, cooking and weeding, some things are bound to take a backseat.

(Hi, knititch!)

Messy Tuesday

If you are visiting from Chewing the Fat and would like to read what Dave referenced, scroll down to yesterday's post.

Here's my Messy Tuesday offering.

Clothes waiting to be donated, the winter duvet bundled up on the cedar chest (right), and the same EXACT laundry basket I showed you weeks and weeks ago.

And Mum and I are sitting here knitting and having tea and scones. Lovely.

Busy. Cold. Soaking wet. And messy.

Welcome to our home! This is the front closet.

Below is the ficus, which has become habitat for a little tiny spider. Tiny, but prolific. In four days the guy spun a mass of webbing from the ficus ONE METER up to a paper lampshade, then another ONE POINT TWO METERS over to the mantle. And this isn't just one web - it's a six-inch wide mass of strands. You can't see from this picture, but it's quite splendid. Mr HSBoots glanced up at it and said "When was the last time you dusted?"

I don't know, but I can tell you it was after the last time YOU dusted.

I haven't had much knitting time lately. Between the kids, the dog, the garden and the housework (ha ha!) the yarn has had to take a backseat. However, in my waiting-around time I've done one of two socks:

in Lion Brand Magic Stripes yarn. (Thanks for the yarn, Ames!)I'm knitting these at about 7 sts per inch on 2.5 mm Addi Turbos.

Can I just say that the best part of magic looping is the money you save on needles? I used to knit socks with two circulars, which is great except that you have to buy two of the same size needle. A 30 cm needle costs the same as a 100 cm needle...might as well buy just one.

Lastly, it is May the 13th. Please observe my thermostat:

I HAVE THE HEAT ON. It's 8 degrees and pouring outside. Not even the DOG wants to go out today. He went over to his potty corner when he first got up and, shivering, squatted down to answer the call of nature. He looked up at me with a resentful eye - which got a direct hit a second later by a huge, icy drop of rainwater from the pine tree.

It was hilarious, but he didn't much appreciate my laughter. Can't take a joke, I guess.

And last night I drove past the house of pain. Would-be Ike Turner's vehicle was sitting comfortably in the driveway. I guess this means they patched things up, after all.

Ain't love grand.

I Bruised my Butt Falling off the Wagon

All right, I really let you all down today. It's supposed to be Messy Tuesday and I cleaned up.

What happened was, I realised yesterday that my sister was going to be in town this week - she arrived last night, actually, and she is not one who wallows in the disarray. In consideration of her preferences, I cleaned up.




Sorry.


Anyway, look! Over there! It's a cute doggie!

Aw, he's so cute when he smiles like that!

Don't tell me it's just gas.

Snuffly kiss for you.

Amy March's Slippers - Day One

Good afternoon everyone! Today is the first day of the Amy March Slippers Knitalong, with your kind and attentive hosts, Bethro and Challoner. I know some people jumped the gun and did their slippers early - and test knitting is always constructive, so good for you.

As for me, things have been busy around here the last 24 hours, so I don't know how quickly I'll get these done, but I have begun precisely on schedule.

I had to buy some chunky weight yarn for these slippers, as it's a weight I don't normally keep in the stash. I was in MichaeI's last week and got these.

The Shetland Chunky is the colour I prefer, but I thought the weight wouldn't be quite right...since I wanted to make more than one pair anyway, I picked up the Wool-Ease. It's got a lower wool content than I normally like but it takes all kinds to make up a stash...or something.

Anyway, I cast on today with my beloved magic loop method, using Meg Swansen's Turkish cast on. I think. I'm never sure what the difference is between the Turkish and the figure 8 cast on.

And here I am modelling the first twelve rounds against the backdrop of my Messy Tuesday post. This is what happens when a puppy prances into the house and you immediately discover the fifteen or twenty things you thought were up high enough but weren't. (And when you have tea twice and forget to put both pots away, and pin out your Cap Shawl and forget to put the pins away, and....and....and....)

More tomorrow.

Specifically speaking....

The days, they do go by. Here it is Messy Tuesday again, and I almost forgot to chronicle my slatternly ways.

I realised, when reading over last week's post, that you could probably put together a documentary just using the material from my Messy Tuesday posts. What I mean by that is, I am giving way too much detail.

I present to you the new, streamlined Messy Tuesday post.

Here's the mess:

it's my coffee table. This has been here for at least six weeks. It's an old mess - a comfortable mess. The kind of mess that thumps its tail on the hearthrug when you get home. I'm rather fond of it.

And here's what I did instead of cleaning it up:

which got me these,

which were delicious.

Status Quo

"That’s the biggest mess the world has seen!!!”
Mom yelled at me quite loud.
But it’s a new world’s record so you’d think that she’d be proud.

-Gregory K


(copied with implicit permission from here)




Ah, yes. Once again it is Messy Tuesday. I was so disorganised today I almost forgot to post about the disarray. Which, really, is a sign of undoubted success.

Let's start with something nice and light. One might call it an aperitif of disorder.

Toys are kind of a gimme for Messy Tuesday, if you're a household with kids. In this picture I particularly like how the Amy Morris doll is peering up at me like I've just caught her with her hand in the till. Actually her hand is in the lemonade stand. But you'll also note the roll of Christmas wrap, which really ought to be moved. I'll think about that while I show you this:




This is Mr HalfSoledBoots' side of the bed. I like the composition of this photo because a lot of different aspects of our lives are represented. You see the Bible there, in the black case - Religion. You see the blood pressure monitor and the empty Kleenex box - Health. There is the Usborne "Big Book of Picture Puzzles" - Family, and also Education. You see in the upper-left the upside-down witch hat belonging to Emily's Hallowe'en costume - Philosophy. Then there are the urban planning periodicals - Career. Lastly you have a little scrap of quilting fabric wrapped in a promotional band - Hobbies - and a pair of bobby pins - Personal Care.

(Admiring applause?)

I have saved the most desperate mess for last. You will probably think it's no big deal, but here is my craft corner:



I call this a Desperate Mess because of that wicker basket you see there. It's huge. It's about 40 centimeters deep, maybe 50 wide, and probably about 80 long. And it's packed so full that its density is probably distorting the gravitational pull of earth. I briefly thought about doing some calculation on the bulk density of X number of knitting projects in Y amount of space, but stopped when I began to bleed from the ears. Suffice it to say there is a lot of yarn there - the appearance of the topmost layer is deceptive - something like the placid surface of a cauldron pool under which some lethal and seething monster lies dormant.

Interestingly, I have been looking for my headphones for two days and it's only just now that I notice they're on top of the wicker white dwarf.

In the face of the mess - albeit contained - that the wicker basket represents, those sloppy-looking plastic bags, and the cardboard box in which my Starmore kit arrived and in which it still languishes, are laughable.

I showed you mine - now you show me yours.

Addendum:
Meme item number 6: I took first-year Astronomy in university. I got an A- in the course, and an A+ in the lab. It turns out Physics, like a lot of other things, is just about being careful and printing neatly. (Luckily I didn't take it long enough to explore more deeply and find out I am wrong, and stupid.)

The Truth Shall Set You Free

Mel over at Pipe Dreams and Purling Plans brought this to my attention last week - it's a new thing called "Messy Tuesday" where we all come clean (but only in the figurative sense) about our 'unideal' homes. She posted her first Messy Tuesday today, and luckily I will never have trouble coming up with something to post on at least ONE day a week.




Just inside the front door. Note the bits of leaf and dirt, bag of thrift store donation, bike helmet, recyclable grocery bags, assorted shoes, and scuffed-up flyer.



The stereo cabinet. The perplexing thing about this mess is that it is so obviously a quick and easy clean. And yet, there it sits. (Let's conjugate that verb: It sits, it has sat, it will sit.)



The top of the cedar chest in my bedroom. Clean, folded towels (they are on about day 8 on the chest), a coin belt (day 7), crumpled discarded clothes (various vintages). At bottom left-centre you can also spot the end of another laundry basket which is full of odds and ends from a crisis clean a few weeks ago. You know the kind of thing - grab a laundry basket and run through the living room, sweeping everything off surfaces and into the basket, deposit the basket in a bedroom and shut the door, with the vague intention of sorting it all out later.

Mel says I should do something that's NOT cleaning and tell you about it, so I will go have a cookie and read some more of Time Will Darken It while the kids are watching Max and Ruby.

Man I have a great life.

Thanks Mel.

Edit: Are you guys serious? You don't think that's messy?! Okay, then what about THIS:

Floor in the corner of the bathroom. NOTE THE DIRT.

Or THIS:

Laundry room.

Is that better?

I've got one awful picture I'm holding in abeyance, but please don't make me show you a flash photograph of the floor behind my toilet. Please.