Thursday, January 11, 2007

Totally Inappropriate

My friend came over for a couple of days and the first night we spent an hour or so after the kids had gone to bed, setting up their castle set. It was great fun, but I have to admit it got a lot funnier after this occurred to us.

I could say "after it occurred to her" but the truth is we were both equally culpable.

And yes, we put it to rights before the children got up in the morning.

We had a great time, though, knitting and chatting. She leaves in ten days or so to the Antarctic, and she's not back until mid-April. I'll miss her while she's gone. It's her last trip to Antarctica - she is moving on to other priorities - so she intends to make the most of the Stash Enhancement opportunities available down in the Southern Hemisphere. Apparently the yarn shops in Argentina are To Die For, never mind the ones in the Falkland Islands and in New Zealand. (She really makes the most of her trips, spending weeks on side excursions before and after her guiding cruises are over.) When I was staying with her in Victoria she showed me her's completely full of gorgeousness. She actually has a few balls of merino/possum yarn, which is so soft you would not believe it. She tells me it's prohibitively expensive, though, so she could only afford a scarf-worth.

I'm on the home stretch of St Brigid - I have finished one sleeve and have only the other sleeve, and the collar, to knit. I'm doing everything I can, up to and including neglecting my children, in order to finish in the next six days. It's so annoying - I have had to teach them all kinds of things to increase their independence.

CHARLOTTE: (Tentatively) "Mom? Can I have something to eat besides Kraft Dinner and Wheatlets?"

ME: (Vaguely, while trying to do a tricky cable cross) "Oh, are you hungry again? There's a box of Ritz over there - help yourself."

CHARLOTTE: (Sighing) "Okay... but my tummy doesn't feel very good."

ME: (Impatiently, while counting stitches and joining in a new ball) "Oh for goodness' sake... all right, grab that green bottle from on top of the microwave."

CHARLOTTE: "You mean the vitamins? But I can't open it."

ME: (Rolling eyes) "All RIGHT, Charlotte. Push down while turning..... no -- DOWN.... no, push down WHILE turning. There you go. Enjoy. Oh - please give one to your sister too."

I should be nominated for some kind of parenting award.


Gwen said...

I am totally laughing my head off, that is too, too funny. Silly foolishness!

Ames said...

No doubt that was Playmobil's original intent for that set. Obviously, only the discerning would have figured it out.

Shan said...

I know, I know - it's totally not appropriate.

Be thankful I spared you the sight of what my friend dreamed up for the carriage horses.

Gwen said...

This is like discovering that your parents "had to hump to get you" (to use the words that smashed my world to pieces in 1982), or finding out, as a homophobic 15 year old, that Tchaikovsky was actually a mincing, lisping gay with very young "friends."

Shan said...

I'm wavering between typing:

"I'm starting to regret posting this"


"Oh, lighten up you guys."

ames said...

Gwen, please you are making me blush. I didn't know you knew the "H" word.

Gwen said...

I don't. And my parents DID NOT.

Kate said...

I know my parents didn't. My brother and I are adopted.