Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Exercise a high degree of caution

I wasn't going to even comment on the Sandy Hooks thing. It's all a bit much for a nice peaceful, artsy, family-oriented Canadian blog.

But I've gotten a bit upset about it.

And something has just occurred to me.

I think the Canadian government should post a travel advisory about visiting the US, similar to the ones they use for countries like Mexico, Bahrain, and Lebanon. It should read something like this:

There is no nationwide advisory in effect for the United States. However, you should exercise a high degree of caution due to the threat of unpredictable terrorist attacks in public spaces. Be aware that there is anti-Canadian sentiment in places, especially northern regions close to the Canada/US border. Be aware that there are 90 guns for every 100 people in the US.

Or maybe this -- just to keep it simple:

Foreign Affairs and International Trade Canada advises against non-essential travel to the United States due to heightened tensions and crime.

Then again, it's probably not necessary - aside from the occasional shooting of a Canadian customs officer, gun-toting Americans seem to stick to murdering their own people rather than ours. If you're a Canadian, just don't go to any movie theatres. Or malls. Or elementary schools. You know - the usual spots where bullets fly.


1) We (the US) should remove all gun regulations so everybody can have them, not just criminals. [Adam Lanza wasn't a criminal. He was an Everybody. So was James Eagan Holmes. Bet you any money, the next psycho who opens fire at a group of moviegoers or innocent little kids will be, too.]
2) One well-placed firearm at Sandy Hook could have prevented the entire slaughter. [Unless, y'know, the well-placed-firearm carrier was down the hall at the time. But hey - more guns in schools is a great idea! Then the kids can be caught in cross-fire as well as just regular fire. That's what they need - MORE bullets to dodge. A bunch of kindergartners at the O.K. fucking Corral.]
3) Guns don't kill people, people kill people. [Yup, they do. With guns.] You can kill somebody with a ball-point pen, too - why not make THOSE illegal? [You're right. You might find it hard to kill 26 women and children in 10 minutes with a ball-point pen, though. Maybe you could get them to stand really still?]

American culture is violent and it glorifies violence*. The weird thing is how shocked we still are when violence happens.
*CAUTION: link to disturbing, mainstream images

So in six months' time, when some Everybody, regular Joe, I-don't-understand-it-he-always-seemed-so-normal American gets tired of the Canadians taking over the CostCo parking lot in Bellingham and brings his Bushmaster assault rifle, or his Gluck handgun, or whatever, and opens fire on Punjabi Canadians who are trying to buy milk (THOSE BASTARDS HOW DARE THEY), I for one won't be surprised.

Maybe we should all rethink our Nexus card renewals, and use our purchasing dollars to boost the economy in our own, gentle, country.

O Canada. Thank you for everything.

1 comment:

Dave Hingsburger said...

I say A ...YES I SAY A fucking MEN!!