Three Conversations from ICU

First, do no harm. Second, hire a knitter for every bedside.

- Hippocrates (The Lost Writings)

Act I, Scene I.

ICU, two hours after surgery to remove a colorectal tumour. I am with my friend, holding her chilly hand and watching, with her husband, as the surgeon approaches.

SURGEON: So was everybody praying up at the school? Was there an assembly?

PATIENT: [smiling weakly] Yes.

SURGEON: Well, things went beautifully. There was no bleeding at all - it was remarkable. We reconnected it no problem. And we got everything out - it hadn't spread, and your liver was completely clear. You don't even have to have an abdominal drain, or a tube in your throat...I must say, Somebody up there is looking out for you. [Clears throat] We were done early - do you have any pain?

PATIENT: No, none. I think the epidural is working perfectly.

SURGEON: You know...I think you can have some clear fluids. Would you like a cup of tea?

Act I, Scene II. ICU, 1800 hrs. Husband has left, other friend is gone, the green cabled blanket is doing its job, folded over my friend's body and arms. I am sitting by the bed knitting quietly.

PATIENT: Is that your lace?

KNITTER: Yes, this is it.

PATIENT: Are you almost finished?

KNITTER: No, and I'm going to run out of yarn.

PATIENT: [distressed] Oh, no, not again! Did you not buy enough?

KNITTER: The pattern called for 800 yards, I bought 900 meters. I think running out of yarn is just my curse. It's just What Happens To Me...it's okay.

PATIENT: And is that your new sock?

KNITTER: Yes - I started it for Hospital Knitting but I think I should have chosen something simpler.

PATIENT: [closing eyes] No. I like it.

Act I, Scene III. 1845 hrs. I've done half a repeat on the sock, and several repeats on the lace edging. The ICU is quieting down for the night.

PATIENT: [rousing] You should go home to your family.

KNITTER: I will soon...at seven, I think.

PATIENT: I love having you here knitting. I don't feel like I have to entertain you or anything.

KNITTER: Just as long as you don't think you need to be awake for me.

PATIENT: No, actually you're the only person I don't feel I need to stay awake for.

KNITTER: Good.

Several drowsy minutes pass.

PATIENT: [fighting back tears] I can't begin to tell you what a comfort you've been to me today. Thank you so much for coming to sit with me and knit...it makes me feel safe.

KNITTER: [trying not to cry, saying nothing]

Benvenuto a Venezia!

Wellness Blanket
Pattern: none. Closed-loop cables from Viking Patterns for Knitting (Lavold) and Aran Knitting (Starmore). Traditional Aran rope cables from Cables Untangled.
Yarn: 14.5, 50g balls Mission Falls 1824 wool 100% superwash merino
Yarn Cost: $97
Yarn Source: Village Yarns, Cumberland, BC
Needles: 5mm bamboo circular
Finished dimensions: 70" long, 27" wide
Cast on: September 1, 2007
Bound off: September 27, 2007
Notes: Someday I may knit another Lavold chart again, but only if I have in the interim sustained a debilitating head injury which has rendered me incapable of either accessing my own memories or of understanding advice given to me by others, namely my mother or the other members of Riverstitch. In this teeny tiny little chart (the "three-bight happiness" sign shown alternating on the edge) there were two big mistakes and several things-which-could-have-been-done-better, necessitating extensive tinkering. And recall I knitted Gyrid to perfect gauge, in a size which should have had two inches of negative ease, to end up with something that would comfortably fit 1.5 of me. My mother is, at this moment, knitting Liv, a design from Volume 1, which is riddled with errata.



The Starmore chart, however, was perfect. No flaws. Flaw-free since 1999.



I took 8 days off knitting this blanket, due to the sore wrist, so altogether it only took about 18 days. The Mission Falls wool knits up fast and smooth and I LIKES it.


I didn't block the blanket because I think it'll take a good while to dry, and my friend goes in for surgery in 8 days. It'll probably need washing when she gets out of the hospital anyway, so I'll block it for her then. I'm sure it will grow in the process.



I didn't enjoy knitting this blanket, for the first couple of weeks. After I took the week off, I felt better about it - I had gained a bit of emotional distance and restocked some of my optimism reserves. I think it was important to feel as good about it as possible, and I suspect my mental state was what actually caused the sore wrist (which, strangely, didn't hurt while I was swatching for another project during the 8-day hiatus - only while knitting this blanket).

And fall has arrived here on Vancouver Island:
This is a cart return in the parking lot of my favourite grocery store. Nobody seemed to want to return their carts there, though. There must have been a dearth of hip waders worn that day.

Random Title Here.

My friend got her surgery date. She's going in on October 9. She won't be undergoing radiation beforehand...she had an MRI last week and radiating is not necessary or beneficial.

I finished her wrap a few days ago...I just need to block it a bit, and sew in all 28 ends, then it will be ready. I keep meaning to take some pictures but haven't got around to it, what with all the Living I've had to do lately. But basically it looks like it did before, only longer.

I'll try to get a few pictures taken as soon as I can... in the meantime, hang in there my lovely rodent friends.

THIS IS HOW I FEEL ABOUT LIFE

Mum, Ox, Ames, Polite Lurkers: Beware. Extreme Rudeness Ahead.

Okay, sorry it has been a while. A few things happened -- a bit of fall cleaning, some cleaning-induced depression, ruminations on the meaning (or lack of meaning) of life, the start of school (my daughter is in Grade One at Ye Olde Homeschool) and a bit of knitting. It kept me busy.

Progress on the blanket. I am on ball 11 of 19, but I won't be knitting the whole 19 because the yardage is taking me farther than I thought it would.

But I have slowed down drastically on the blanket. Because of this.

Note the tensor. I'm not sure how I have ended up with a wrist injury. It wasn't from the knitting. I do vaguely recall letting Emily swing from my hand on the way to the library, and thinking at the time, "yowch." Obviously it was worse than I thought -- bad enough to keep me awake nights.

I've had to take a rest from knitting the heavy blanket. And you can see how I feel about the whole state of affairs, as evidenced by my rude hand gesture (I am flipping off Life, if you're wondering) and my expression. This is a slight departure from my usual sunny radiance (again, if you're wondering).

I have just realized that this is the first picture of me you have seen on my blog. An interesting choice for an introduction, really.

I have also just realized this must be the face that Charlotte calls "Scary Mummy".

Five by Five

Thank you for your comments on the last post. I think it's the first time in my life I read a poem over the next day, and desired to make neither additions nor deletions. Everything I have felt for the last four days is right there, buried in those three cryptic stanzas.

Last Friday my dear friend was diagnosed with cancer. By the end of September she will have had 5 days of radiation and a surgery to remove the tumour in her colon. She will be in the hospital about a week.

Friday night I didn't sleep, so Saturday was a bit of a sinkhole for me, but I drove to Village Yarns and headed straight for the Mission Falls 1824 washable wool. After her surgery my friend will need something to pull around her at 4.40 AM in the halflight, when she is awake and fearful and hurting, and her family and friends are all sleeping in their own beds.

The kind, sympathetic, supportive and incredibly helpful owner had 19 balls of this colour - I bought them all, drove home, and started flipping through the books: Cables Untangled, Aran Knitting, and Viking Patterns for Knitting. I did some haphazard math, double checked it as well as my distracted, exhausted, grief-stricken, fearful brain would allow, and cast on.

This takes precedence over everything else in my life at the moment, so the house is a mess and the lace, four days from completion, is resting for now. I am trying for 1.5 balls per day, hoping to be done in about two weeks. Finished dimensions will be about 28" by 80".

The central cable is just a vertically-symmetrical closed celtic knot from Starmore, and the edge is a mirror-image three-bight Norse happiness symbol on a four-stitch, four-row rope cable. I would have liked to have designed something more meaningful for the centre but time is of the serious essence here and I had to use what I could find that would fit the dimensions I was hoping for.

Originally I had chosen more of a taupe colour, but the shop owner gently suggested that a strong green would be more appropriate for a "wellness blanket" (thank you Karen for that phrase). I think she's so right and I'm glad she brought me up short before I bought depressing beige yarn for my friend's recovery.

I'm trying to be positive and happy as I knit this for my friend. I don't know how well I'm succeeding on the happiness thing but I do know that I'm thinking of her and wishing her healing, and praying all I can, with every wrap of yarn and sweep of needle.